• Betsy Ross

There is No Getting Over It

Sometimes it's difficult to say "everything will be alright", and that's okay. But when referring to the actual steps it takes to overcome an obstacle, a past, a regret even, "alright" has many faces. When would someone feel open to admitting and accepting that they are indeed "alright"?


A soldier comes home after receiving his DD214, then what? All the expectations to "adapt and overcome" topple on top of one another, and the soldier tries to feel normal. Though the definition of "normal" has different perceptions, the desire to be "normal" is still there. Most of us want to feel sane, or "normal", but the adjustments to get reacquainted with ourselves becomes quickly an obstacle we would rather avoid. Re-adapting to not having to be in formations or be somewhere at a certain time (until he finds a job) is part of the process. The reintroduction to a sense of freedom is overwhelming, and some people may think that it shouldn't be but the past is never too far behind for some individuals. Some pretend everything is good at first and then there are some veterans who struggle from Day 1 as a reborn civilian.


Some soldiers embrace it quickly and do everything they possibly can to "enjoy" those freedoms they can now do. However, many also face the downfalls behind it all. There's a wall. They would probably ask themselves at this point, "what now?"


At this wall, or fork in the road, depending on the situations they have been dealt with, it is overwhelming to have such decisions present themselves all at once. Some of the feelings make the (now) veteran feel lost, confused, and unimportant. This is the fuse that once starts, it can either motivate them to set more goals or push them off the edge of mentally becoming unstable that leads to depression and possibly an increase in alcohol and/or drugs.


The phrase "just get over it" is not fit in the mental health field because as anyone knows, life happens; scars don't heal right away; every individual is effected differently from all and any event that happened to them.


How are you embracing changes in behavior of someone you know struggling with change? Or, is it you yourself who is questioning what the meaning to life is anymore? Have you reached out or told anyone your concerns? Did you count 3 GOOD THINGS that happened today? What are your goals in the near future? Do you have a 10-year plan? What will you do now that you have hit a wall? Will you help someone else who is struggling also? FIGHT for yourself and those around you. We all hit a wall; there is no battle you have to face alone.


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